How much is too much?

So I must say that the Gribbin clan has been literally pulled through hell and back these past few months and we are still riding the rollar coaster of unknown. Between Brothers, mommas, and baby sisters, we have experienced a whirl wind of hospital visits, tears, smiles, and tons more that is unexplainable. Our family truly has a six sense for feeling each others pain, grievance and triumphs. We don't even need to talk....we just "get it" now. I've learned this the past few weeks and it's amazing.

Currently I am feeling ok. Trying to keep my head up and staying strong for my little Kay Kay who is still at CHOP. Admitted Tuesday with a fever, soars in her mouth and throat that look liked a torch went off in it, and a "rip roaring" cough that would make anyone cringe. Well with those symptoms and high blood pressure, she was taken in almost immediately. After visiting Wednesday and seeing her condition I honest ly thought the Gribbin group as we know might change. Mikaela did not even look like herself. Her skin swollen and gray, eyes circled in black bruises and the whites of her eye ball were as red as fire. I had to swallow my tears and show a tiny smile of hope that the doctors would come up with a diagnosis, and cure. After questions, needles, swabs, and more, still no answers have been given. I left last night feeling like someone pulled a sheet over my eyes and body and I was helpless and speechless. There was nothing we could do to help. Even the morphine made her vomit and feel worse. I could see the life exiting her motionless body. The most terrifying feeling entered my gut and has not fully escaped yet .

However, in all of this torture, she has been blessed with our mom and dad sitting by her side and a staff of nurses and doctors that have been working ruthlessly to find an answer. The strength alone radiating out of momma g is breathtaking. Incredibly strong, sure and fighting until the last hair has been looked at. I was in awe seeing her in action. I can honestly say that if I am one fraction of my mother, I will be a mom like no other.

Currenly MIkaela is gaining strength back and a pink tint is beginning to hide the gray lifeless tone her skin appeared to be Wednesday. The swelling has subsided, and seems to continue to go down. The new pain killers are kicking in and my little Kay Kay is slowly returning. She was beautiful today. Inside and out. Fighting for comfort, for an answer, and just to get the hell home. With support from friends and family she is feeling more like herself every day. We hope she comes home Saturday with questions answered and a cure for whatever it has been that we are wishing away. It is amazing how something so terrible can really make you see the beauty in life and unconditional love. I would have literally killed to be near her and I have never felt so "alone" being out here in Reading. This is just another reminder that there is nothing stronger than family and the bond of sisters. I have been blessed and I just pray that mikaela gets well very soon. Nothing else in the world matters....