How much is too much?

So I must say that the Gribbin clan has been literally pulled through hell and back these past few months and we are still riding the rollar coaster of unknown. Between Brothers, mommas, and baby sisters, we have experienced a whirl wind of hospital visits, tears, smiles, and tons more that is unexplainable. Our family truly has a six sense for feeling each others pain, grievance and triumphs. We don't even need to talk....we just "get it" now. I've learned this the past few weeks and it's amazing.

Currently I am feeling ok. Trying to keep my head up and staying strong for my little Kay Kay who is still at CHOP. Admitted Tuesday with a fever, soars in her mouth and throat that look liked a torch went off in it, and a "rip roaring" cough that would make anyone cringe. Well with those symptoms and high blood pressure, she was taken in almost immediately. After visiting Wednesday and seeing her condition I honest ly thought the Gribbin group as we know might change. Mikaela did not even look like herself. Her skin swollen and gray, eyes circled in black bruises and the whites of her eye ball were as red as fire. I had to swallow my tears and show a tiny smile of hope that the doctors would come up with a diagnosis, and cure. After questions, needles, swabs, and more, still no answers have been given. I left last night feeling like someone pulled a sheet over my eyes and body and I was helpless and speechless. There was nothing we could do to help. Even the morphine made her vomit and feel worse. I could see the life exiting her motionless body. The most terrifying feeling entered my gut and has not fully escaped yet .

However, in all of this torture, she has been blessed with our mom and dad sitting by her side and a staff of nurses and doctors that have been working ruthlessly to find an answer. The strength alone radiating out of momma g is breathtaking. Incredibly strong, sure and fighting until the last hair has been looked at. I was in awe seeing her in action. I can honestly say that if I am one fraction of my mother, I will be a mom like no other.

Currenly MIkaela is gaining strength back and a pink tint is beginning to hide the gray lifeless tone her skin appeared to be Wednesday. The swelling has subsided, and seems to continue to go down. The new pain killers are kicking in and my little Kay Kay is slowly returning. She was beautiful today. Inside and out. Fighting for comfort, for an answer, and just to get the hell home. With support from friends and family she is feeling more like herself every day. We hope she comes home Saturday with questions answered and a cure for whatever it has been that we are wishing away. It is amazing how something so terrible can really make you see the beauty in life and unconditional love. I would have literally killed to be near her and I have never felt so "alone" being out here in Reading. This is just another reminder that there is nothing stronger than family and the bond of sisters. I have been blessed and I just pray that mikaela gets well very soon. Nothing else in the world matters....

Spring is here!

Spring is finally here (and I say that loosely because of such a mild winter and our already hot spring days of high 70s) and I'm feelin good. I am still in the same spot, lonely and bored, but my outlook on life is positive and reassuring. I had such a great st.patty's day weekend with family and friends in NYC, and I look forward to a 30th b-day celebration for my big sissy Kelly this coming weekend. I can't wait for the food, laughs and drinks. It will be fantastic to say the least!

As for life as I know it, nothing has budged really. Still getting by with FaceTime and phone calls and trying to look at the bright side. There is light at the end of this grueling tunnel though and I know it will be here soon. Patience is a virtue.

As for my bod and the lack of monthly flow, who knows what is up. I'm going to see the doc next week to get an opinion and to get a good "inner laugh" at the fact that my doctor looks exactly like the sloth from the movie Ice Age. In all seriousness though he is a great doctor and I'm sure he will come up with a solution to my odd and irregular lady flow.

The solution to all of this mess is dream big....think of the future and keep that smile on. It's the best fashion accessory a girl can wear....just keep up with the wrinkle cream then ;)

Rita's is opening soon...

And you know what that means...beautiful spring is in the air! Gosh how I love the birds, flower buds, fresh air, and heat from the sun on my face! It's amazing what a little 60 degree weather can do for a girl.

Even though spring has almost sprung and I feel good inside my body and my mind, I can still feel my missing parts and they long to be filled. I'm staying positive though and riding off this past weekend with the chicas that I love so much and this weekend with Dom and some bloom folk! I do have great things ahead I'm excited to keep busy with work and play! Dom is still patiently waiting with the current company and things are moving forward but the process is tedious. He is being so wonderful and positive throughout the entire process and it amazes me. His "cool" and calming way of dealing with current situations is awesome. I thank god I have him to keep me grounded. As for me and life in general, I'm just going through the motions, trying to enjoy each day to its fullest no matter what. Training for broad street and using the long runs to clear my head is paying off. My new 2012 quote is this: "if you can't get out of it, get in it", and I've been living by it. Contentment is right around the corner...I know it.